Whose that crazy Chicken Lady?

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Thank you for stopping in! I am Christian married to Mr. Awesome, who is my Helpmeet and cheerleader. We are a blended family of 5 kiddos and 2 beautiful Grandbabies! I am Domestic Abuse survivor/DV Advocate, Lyme Disease Warrior, avid crafter, blogger, vlogging, budding Herbalist,Birth Junkie, growing our own food, lover of dusty treasures and all around goofball.

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Thursday, August 3, 2017

Repost- How I met the love of my life


Find the original post here- How I met the love of my life

I finished my book and hope to have it finalized before the end of the year! 

I've had a wonderful support team help in proofing it and can't thank them enough. They did offer a suggestion...

How in the world did Mr. Awesome (Terry) come into the picture?

I hadn't gave that much thought, until they mentioned it. 

Well! We met via the antique shop I managed with my ex. Terry came in for consignment,with his Sister one evening as I was getting ready to close. His Sister explained that he needed to downsize his home. 

His plan was to sell everything and travel the States. He was also waiting for a job offer to come through. This position was with the government and had already taken a number of months to submit paperwork and an impressive background check.

He liked the shop well enough and decided to allow me to sell his stuff. 

Now, I was still married to my ex and my mind was not on filling my empty heart with another. Though Terry had dreamy eyes (He still does!)

I advised my ex that we had a new guy coming in. I was immediately peppered with questions about Terry's appearance. If I thought he was good looking and the like.

I managed to sell quite a bit of Terry's items in just a few months and he made a wee bit over a grand in just a little time. 

Terry and his brother had went out to celebrate after receiving his first consignment. He gave me a phone call to thank me for all my help. I, so happened to be out with my Son down the street from our home for karate lessons when the call came. 

We chatted briefly. I felt flushed and anxious as I knew Will would possibly check my calls when I arrived back. 

Sure enough he checked my cell and began to interrogate me about who it was. Why did he call? Was I screwing around with him? And so on. This went on for several hours. I adamantly was not having an affair with Terry or anyone else.

Will finally let it go for the night. 

The next day I was called by Will about 4 times an hour, throughout the day to grill me if Terry had shown up. He made a few threatening remarks and of course I was a mess the whole day.

Terry and his brother happen to show up with more goodies to consign. He asked how I was and for some reason the flood gates opened and I just started crying. 

I apologized about not being professional and losing it. He gently told me "No worries". I left them to finish unloading, so I could compose myself. 

I was embarrassed! I didn't intend to breakdown, much less in front of a stranger. Terry finished and came up to the desk. He apologized if his call got me in hot water and said if I ever decided to leave the guy to give him a call. He would be happy to buy me a celebratory drink. 

I thanked him and that was it. I didn't give the exchange any further thought. I would be lying if I didn't want to just rush off with this guy. He seemed so easy going and he made me laugh every time we chatted. 

When Will came to the shop and Terry was around or if he would see him coming into the shop, he would make me go upstairs. We kept stock and other random things up there that was not open to the public. He would call me down when Terry left. 

A few times I heard Terry ask for me, but Will would say I was busy. Will would later mockingly say "Your boyfriend stopped by. Why does he ask for you Mel? Is that because your seeing him?" 

Several months after leaving Will, I had finally decided to call my dearest Friend, Darlene. She had been a good source of solace, friendship and sounding board. I trust her with my life. I mean that! She's my 2nd Momma.

So, we talked about getting together for a evening. I did call Terry for giggles and another friend. Terry was surprised to hear from me, as well as to the news that I was no longer with Will. He promised he would buy me that drink to celebrate. 

Subject change. I've mentioned that I advise against taking up the party lifestyle, drinking and so on. I only do this because of little experience, as small of a window that it was. Do as I say, not as I do! 

Back to the story!

I met Darlene, having 1 Captain and Morgan. My Sister got me hooked on them. I am a light weight! I don't drink a lot. Too much hurts my stomach. So, I am lucky if I get 3 down. Also, I have found through some research my Lyme Disease does affect the body. There I go again, back to the story again.

So, I'm several sheets to the wind after 1 drink. Terry shows up and he converses with Darlene about my state. 

By the way, I am a cheerful person and this amplifies when I've had a few. I sing, dance and laugh a lot (without drinking) figure in drinking. OH BOY! I've been told I'm a blast. Mind you, this is after a drink or 2.

He advises Darlene he will get me some coffee and food in my belly. She leaves me hesitantly but I recall he giving me a hug and telling me to call her the next day if I remember.

Terry took me down the road to a restaurant. I unloaded again! I didn't leave anything out. I told him about the abuse, the swinging, affairs Will had, our cooties (HSV2- Herpes Simplex 2), and my thoughts about running away to a commune or somewhere in the woods to go off-grid. Believe it or not that guy didn't run away screaming. 

I felt relieved. I sobered up pretty well. We talked for hours. We parted ways, but before doing so, he asked me to text him so he knew I made it home okay.  

I texted him and he asked if it would be okay if he could maybe chat with me again or if I would consider going out on a real date sometime. I said sure. I didn't want to sound too eager. The madness of Will was still a huge part of my life at this time. Jumping into a relationship wasn't something I wasn't sure I wanted to do. But, I admit, I really liked Terry.

He called me the next day! He asked if I would go on a day trip with him. It would be a surprise.

We met early in the morning for breakfast. Then we went to go Antiquing! He didn't think I got a chance to do so since I was at the shop about 7 days a week. 

Afterwards we had lunch at a cute little greasy spoon. He said he had another surprise trip in mind. 

I mentioned to him during my drunken rant that of things and placed I hadn't seen or done. One of the places I mentioned was a Casino. So, he took me to Four Winds Casino. It was about a 40 minute drive. He gave me money to play. I lost it quickly. 

Our day lasted from 8:00 am til 10:30ish. I didn't want to it to end! I had a great time. 

He called me for another date and we were Peas in the pod since then! 


Terry became my rock for me when I wavered. He has gallantly helped me through some knee knocking situations during tough times. 

He's wiped my tears, been a big protector of us, made sense of what seemed like insanity. Most importantly, loved my children, even when it was tough to do so. Even now, 8 years later, my heart still skips a beat when I see him. I love him more everyday. 

I'm grateful the Lord opened my heart to love again. It could have been a different situation if I found another like my ex, as so many victims find. 


So, dearest Blog reader, I hope hearing this helps. I pray it aspires your to believe in a "Happily ever after..." It is attainable to find your Mr./Ms. Awesome. Don't give up!

Remember, I BELIEVE IN YOU!

Big hugs!
Mel




Friday, July 21, 2017

Someone I think you should know- Lydia

I have been honored to  share several stories of inspiration over this past year. 

Lydia has always been someone I admired, with her amazing smile, enthusiastic outlook on life.  She has been a wonderful voice on the phone when I needed to vent about my own story, afterwards, she opened up, privately, about her situation.

No one would ever know of the personal agonies that hide behind her cheery attitude. 

Sadly, Lydia's story mirrors many victims experiences.

The sensitivity of the following Guest post about Abuse is being labeled with a 'Trigger warning' and not for anyone under 18 to read, unless permission from a parent.

As always, I hope this Lydia brings you inspiration and understanding about a very secretive subject.


I met my husband when I was 26.  

He lived upstairs from me at the apartment I was renting.  I would sit outside on the steps to read ironically, about the time he came home from work each day.  He began to earn my trust by talking about the books I was reading.  

When there was a small fire in the building, we had to move.  We went our separate ways for a while, but he would show up in random places:  at church, at the grocery store, etc.  I didn't realize he was following me.  There were so many coincidences.

I began a new job.  A few weeks later, he just happened to start working there, too.  That's when we started going to breakfast together after work.  He was so charming at first.  

A few months later (This all happened so fast!), he was having trouble finding a place to live.  I thought we were just friends, so I invited him to be my roommate.  I made it clear that our relationship was not going to be sexual.  Even so, he continued to be charming and we started to date.  

Another few short months later, he gave me a ring.  

He was asleep when I came home from work.  When he heard me come in, he popped his hand out of the blankets and in his hand was a ring.  I said yes.  He was still charming.  

Our wedding was a few weeks later.  His charming facade fell away on our wedding night. He changed from this charming, loving guy into an angry control-freak. More about this later.


I inquired whether she had an alarm that went off in her belly, 'Gut instinct'. She states:

Yes, it did.  However, I did not recognize it.  I had been abused by my parents and had therefore not learned to recognize that signal.

Sadly, she is no stranger to abuse. She shared a time in her life when she experienced a dark time:  

Back to the wedding night and honeymoon.  On our wedding night when we arrived at the hotel, I went to the bathroom to change out of my wedding dress.  I heard glass shattering outside the door.  

Somehow, he had broken our wine glasses.  The glass was all over our clothing in our suitcase.  Unbeknownst to me, glass was also on him.  He didn't tell me that there was glass in his penis, yet he proceeded to initiate sex with me.  

As we began, I felt the pain, but since this was my first sexual experience, I thought I should expect some pain.  Soon I discovered the blood.  When I discovered the blood, he began to go on and on about the glass in his penis, yet I was the one bleeding.  I got the glass out of my own body while he proceeded to be angry about the glass in his penis.  I was so confused.  

Where was his anger coming from?  

Why was he angry with me?  

Then, he started laughing and showering me with affection.  I was bleeding so much I wanted to go to the ER.  He begged me not to, saying it was too embarrassing. I listened to him, but was still confused by the change from anger to the love bomb.  I went on as if nothing happened.

On the next several days of our honeymoon, he continued to switch from anger to love-bombing. I continued to be confused, but any attempt to talk to him about the confusion was turned on me stating I was just being silly or oversensitive.  He would also talk in circles, arguing.  He would be arguing without any real point to his argument.  He would change topics often.  

No matter what point I made, he would turn the argument against me.

I asked if at any point in either of any of her situations, did she ever cry out for help to anyone, counseling, help from church or law enforcement? Did anyone ever guess something was off? 

As a child, I once called DCS, asking for help.  When there was an investigation, my parents sweet talked their way through it and threatened to send me away themselves if I ever did it again.  My mother said she would show me what abuse really was.  For the next several months, she emotionally abused me.

When I was married, I no longer recognized abuse as abuse.  

I began to think it was normal.  

Many people, including my ex-husband's parents tried to warn me not to marry him, telling me that I didn't see his true colors.  A friend of mine told me that he was manipulative, controlling, and downright creepy.  

I just didn't see it myself.  

I didn't want to see it.  

Because of the abuse from my parents, I didn't feel lovable.  Here was this man showering me with love.  Sure, he got angry easily, but the love is what I craved.  

I married my self-esteem.  

What kept you going forward?  

When I was a child, hope for a future kept me moving forward.  I did well academically.  I sang well, too.  I was smart and talented.  I knew I would do well in college, and I did.  I had hope for a future that began to come to fruition.

When I got married, that future came to a screeching halt.  My abuser made sure I didn't succeed as a Lutheran Deaconess.  He made sure I didn't participate in vocal performances or choir.  What kept me going then were my children.  I began to hope for their futures as I once hoped for my own.

The questions I hear often is, "Why did you stay?". What were the reasons you stayed?  

First, because of my religious beliefs, I stayed because I did not believe that God wanted me to divorce.  I didn't realize that God also wants us to flee from evil.  I couldn't recognize the abuser as being evil.  

Second, I stayed because of my low self-esteem.  I didn't think that anyone else would love me.  I didn't think I was worth much.  At least I got the love bombs from my abuser.  But over time, those doses of "love" were fewer and farther between.  I didn't know that his "love" was not love at all.  I didn't realize that he was love-bombing me to keep me under his control.

Some victims of abuse do transition into recreational drugs/alcohol, depression, emotional issues or health issues. Had any of these affected you? How are you dealing with your issue and how are you at this point?

I experience depression, even now.  I used to cut in response to the abuse.  I didn't want to, or couldn't lash out at my abusers, so I took it out on myself by cutting.  In order to stop cutting, I began smoking.  I still smoke on and off today.

Children can have various health issues that may not been seen right off the bat as related to abuse. I inquired how her children were handling this situation, she responded:

My children are emotionally delayed.  My son has autism, but I often wonder how many of his symptoms are autism and how many are PTSD.  He has high anxiety and experiences depression.  He goes back and forth between wanting contact with his dad and wanting nothing to do with him.

My daughter has Oppositional Defiant Disorder.  She displays many behaviors that are similar to her father's.  I remind her often that she is not her father.  She has an explosive temper, but is generally the most big-hearted, loving soul.  She has PTSD as well and has recently been making connections between her emotions and what her father did to us.  It is a privilege to watch her begin to heal. 

She is taking the following steps to keep her children and herself safe:

First, I divorced him in 2018.  We are working on our third consecutive protective order.  I have changed our phone number multiple times.  We have a safety plan in place that involves simply calling the police if the abuser shows up and then either exiting the residence to find a safe place, or going to a locked room while speaking to the police.  

Have family and friends been supportive once they have learned of your situation? Did the situation break your relationship with loved ones due to disbelief or fear they have for your abuser?

My family doesn't recognize abuse as abuse because of the abuse we experienced as children.  They are supportive as they can be at this point in everyone's recovery but only one of my siblings can bring herself to call it abuse.  

With friends, I have been blessed.  I reconnected with old friends after the marriage and have rebuilt friendships that were paused while I was married.  I have made new friends with folks who helped me recognize abuse for what it was and stuck with me through it all.

Do you think he will change? If he does, would you go back?

NO! and NO!  Even if he were to change, I can never trust that it is genuine.  

Where do you see yourself a year from now?  

A lot can happen in a year.  

My daughter's healing will likely progress and I expect to see fewer behavioral episodes.  

My son will be less anxious as he begins to trust that the abuser will not be in the picture.  

I will trust myself more as I consistently keep the abuser out of the picture.

How much has you life and have you changed since leaving your abuser?

First and foremost, we are safe.  My health has improved since leaving.  I was having daily seizures and could barely walk, think, or speak much while married.  I haven't had a seizure since the divorce.  While slow at first, I began to walk steadily and think more clearly.  Once the recovery got underway, things moved rather quickly.  I was able to start driving, moved to a new residence and began working part-time.  

My self-confidence is still growing and I believe I am worthy of genuine love.  

My kids went from cowering to looking people in the eye and finding their own voice.

What would you advice can you give to someone that is suffering in silence?  

I would recommend that they find someone to reach out to.  My church helped me so much. Find someone who believes you and can connect you to services such as an advocate.  If the first person you reach out to doesn't believe you or is unable to help, find another person.

I also want to add, that my primary support person is my Pastor.  He saw through the abuser's lies and gently led me out of the prison of abuse.  

Yet, it wasn't my Pastor, but it was God working through him.  God can use anyone to be that person who can lead the way for someone who is still suffering.

Lydia advised that she is open to for contact, if you Dearest Blog reader, would like to discuss her story further. She can be reached at: confessionalmama@aol.com







For help in a abusive situation call-
The National Domestic Violence Hotline-
1-800-799-7233 | 1-800-787-3224 (TTY)

Stay safe and God bless!






Monday, July 10, 2017

Holy smokes Batman! There's a chicken in the house! Give-away time! Update!

Well, not really in our house! But it got you wondering didn't it? Mr. Awesome created a new box for our girls that are in the nesting sort of mood. This will help give our other hens a chance to actually lay in The Abbey for a change. We are pretty sure there is a cache of eggs in the meadow. I'm sure we will discover by smell or in the Fall.

It came out neato and in super condition! HEHE! The Batman cut out was from Mini Man's loft bed that he has since outgrew last year. It's a great repurpose and the girls love it, though they are snuggled up in the same box for some reason. Any insight on this appreciated!


These weeks have been busy! I have been harvesting yummy herbs for teas, smudge sticks, bug bite balms, aches and pain balms. I have a few tinctures planned and hope to broaden my herbs to better serve myself. Sorry sounds stingy doesn't it? It's not meant to. I do share! Honest!

I'm seeking out herbs and plants to help me in my Lyme journey. Buying the plants may seem weird but the cost of many of these are expensive!




We were blessed to have the local power company come and take down power from a barn that hasn't been used in at least a decade! There is a rumor the barn and silo are next! GASP! Now we have already looked at it and thought what can we ask to reuse? The answer is nothing. Most of the structure is in terrible shape. Not too much to be harvested or repurposed. Barn wood you say? A great deal is not the "Oh so gorgeous" barn wood you see on Pinterest. So, we aren't going to be crying to see it go.

The structure has been a hotbed of wild animal love. From Skunks, Raccoons to heaven knows what else!

We have had a busy few weeks, from our Annual Turkey Run Adventure, the micro-burst that hit the homestead a few weeks back to taking a self-defense course that still has me achy!





 Micro-burst mayhem in the next few pictures!
This grain dryer didn't have a dent in it prior to the storm! It was also lifted enough to take it off the concrete pad. The farmer took a peek inside to see if it was salvageable and discovered it would be too costly to repair.










This tank was about 10 feet away from this location as well as around the corner from where it landed. Alcatraz (What we call our quarantine area for animals in the background in front of the bus) was also next to the tank but was toppled to the area that you see here. Mr. Awesome did stand it up before I could take a picture. We were amazed! The barn roof also was lifted up on one side of it. Mr. Awesome has since used Hurricane straps to fasten the roof.

 Here is the agile and amazing aggressive (But not surprising) Ms. Peanut! We were gifted a 1 day session with Protective Tactics out of Chesterton, IN. We learned a great deal to help us in case of an attack and then some. While it was fun and informative, I am afraid it was too intense for me.

Part of the practice was to wait for your 'Attacker' to make his move on you so you can show what skills you have learned. I was a big ball of emotions and broke down. It made me irritated with myself. When will these feelings go away? If you don't know my story read a brief summary here- Hope when there was none- My story of surviving abuse . I was very proud of how well Peanut did during this class but it pains my heart to know how much my children experienced. Enough about that! All in all the class was full of good information.

My book is being edited by a dear Friend.  I pray it will be in Ebook form before the end of the year. No frills. Just information how we escaped our abuser and to let others know they are not alone.

I started implementing restorative yoga 2 to 3 times a week. I'm easing into it. I'm also trying to make sure I walk 4 to 6 miles 5 days a week in order to gain more energy and lose my fluff. I hope to stick to my low carb (Keto) and no sugar eating habit. It's all me and I admit I love my sugar and whites. I kicked them to the curb before but need to dig in with more restraint. None of these are good for Lyme Disease.

My garden isn't as flourishing as I hoped. I'm still losing plants to heat, rabbits and now Japanese Bettles! UGH! The dream of canning a bunch of items may not happen. I do have quite a bit of herbs to dry and have found several spots of Elderberry and Echinacea!

WHOOPIE!

I have also missed a few chances to set up to sell my vintage treasures. I have to admit it but I'm beat after working. The time I do have after is spent napping or just trying to catch up on domestic stuff. Then I'm too tired to think about selling. I've enlisted J.V. to help when she and Mike are available. We worked a bit today with inventory but it was a bit warm out despite Mr. Awesome reminding me to turn on the fan... Duh!

I really hope by next Spring to have some digs to call my own for Customers to browse and shop. I would like to host some foraging and herbal concoction classes too.

Oh did I mention I'll be hosting a Give-A-Way of a Pendulum?
What mystical witchcraft am I spewing? How am I a Christian talking about this?

No I'm not talking about conjuring spirits or anything like that. You can use this as a tool to help you with food and your body. Seriously! Feel free to message me for the how-to's of using this privately.

So how do you win? You have to enter of course! I'll be sharing a post about entering on my Instagram account and at Legacy Antiques and Estate Sales within the next few days. More Give-Aways for the next few months.

Also to come are more interviews, 'Someone I think you should know' as well as updates on a few past interviewees.

 How's your month been so far? I'd love to hear from you!

BIG HUGS!
Mel

****************************************************

Give-away time! Winner will win either 1 necklace or 1 pendulum of their choosing.  Available  Pendulums are #rosequartz , #rosewood , and #opalescence. Like this page or if you already have please Share page on your feed! Leave a comment about which item you would like to win. 1 lucky winner will be chosen on Saturday!

Pendulums can be used as a tool for your health! How?!

You can take it shopping and use it to help you choose what foods are good for your body. As an example:
Is this cheese fresh?
Is this a good buy?
Does this product have preservatives or chemicals in it?
Does this fruit have pesticides?
Is this meal fit to eat?

As you would for muscle testing place a common remedy in your left hand (Peppermint tea, ACV, Eldberry, etc...) and see what the pendulum does!
The fabrics that you wear daily have different vibrations as well and the pendulum can be used to figure out if a particular outfit has good vibrations for you.
Pendulums can be used to help realign the energy of someone that is suffering from Depression as well as Bi-Polar issues.

I was recommended The Pendulum Book by Hanna Kroeger to use. It is very informative and useful as are many of her books!

So! You ready to enter? Head over to Facebook and Like my page- Legacy Antiques & Estate Sales. Comment which item you would like to win. That's it!

Saturday, June 10, 2017

Good-bye Cocky Locky!

I'm sad to say our Banty Roo disappeared. He had been experiencing leg spasms and general malaise. I keep expecting him to come out of the field somewhere. I have an infinity towards the Bantam breed or perhaps it's because I love Miniature anything. I am truly sadden by his loss. He was my last Banty.

Now this isn't the first time we have just seemingly lost a chicken out of thin air and I'm sure it won't be the last. In the past when a chicken was under the weather they would wander off never to be seen again. In my mind I try to romanticize that they found a comfy spot to settle down and pass on. The latter is just too intense to think about. SEE! This is why I shouldn't get attached to our farm animals! I blew my own rule. I'm a BIG sap. I cry at commercials. If someone shares their story of woe or happiness, I cry. If someone gives me a tip at work I cry (This is humbling for me. I treat others how I like to be treated and the last 2 days have been very generous and moving for me with how kind guests have been by tipping!).

I'm not a cry baby just very empathetic and caring. If you read my other blog about my journey as a Domestic Violence Survivor I wear my heart on my sleeve. If someone contacts me to share, it is moving for me when someone shares how reading my blog has helped them. I'm not tooting my own horn.

I mentioned in my previous post that I have been offline a bit. I have just been focusing on my family and in the moment. I may cruise around on Pinterest or Instagram but not for long. There is so much to do. I have to plan my day with 2 things in mind:

1) How am I feeling after work
2) How am I feeling in general

Pushing myself is never a good option. I tend to work myself with such intensity in order to get what I need done finished.

Enough about me!

Peanut has the garden detail this summer. She has been doing a great job! Rather then go nuts and just buy more and more plants I figure that I will get maybe 5 to 10 a year and add to our garden and around the home every year.

The plants I had gotten from Mom are looking pretty sad but I pray they will come around next year.

We went on an adventure last Saturday! Each year I ask the kids to pick 3 things they would like to
do or to go. (Within reason of course) Her picks were the Museum, Zoo and Turkey Run. So we went to Turkey Run! We stayed about an hour and then hit Rockville for lunch, antiquing and ice cream. I was able to have a long weekend and I needed to recover from Saturday for sure! The weather was nice, not too hot, humid or rainy. Can't wait for next year! My eldest was unable to go with us as Short Stack is sick with a virus. Poor baby! She is also cutting her first tooth.

Mr. Awesome has been working on various projects. From
getting a spigot for the outside to creating a cabinet for the kitchen about the stove.

Cherries and Mulberries are ready for picking! We picked a few gallon bags but I hope to can some for pies or jelly/jam. Now we have an understanding in the house for no one to mess with the jars at all. I was saddened to have lost dozens of jars because someone popped them before they cooled as well as leaving the rings on. I was horrified when a jar I had given to someone was moldy!

UGH!

It was JV and thankfully she is wonderful and understanding. She gave me a cute jar with a cross-stitched chicken on it that is adorable. I haven't decided what I'm going to fill it with yet. I have my goals, dreams and wishes that I keep in a box perhaps I'll put those in there instead. OR maybe I will just a thankfulness jar. Either way I am so touched!

What a charmed life we live. Rant to follow right now...

I don't get how people can sleep at night when they are untruthful, surly and downright deceiving. I am a terrible liar. I don't even lie well. I recently cut the hose with my Garden Claw and confessed to Mr. Awesome because I felt so guilty. Oh, now don't get me wrong I have done my fair share of untruthfulness. Like blowing money on a donut or something random that I didn't need and not telling.

I feel if I talk the talk I should walk the walk. I'm not perfect. I fail. I curse. I unsavory thoughts. I
don't always choose the right path. Because I think I'm right doesn't mean I am. Such with the situation above. (I still think I am though) I don't always handle situations right. I am a hypocrite. I fail everyday as a Christian. Boy, I sure am thankful God loved me so much he sent his only Son to die for my sins.

Yep, I went there. Before you shut this window please do me a favor.

Why do you not believe? If you curse God or say why does God let bad things happen to me, think about this...

You are mad, hurt or angry at the wrong being. God is not necessarily lovey dovey. He's not looking the other way at sin nor does he want you miserable.

There is one that loves you to curse the Lord. There is one that dances when you fight or shut your heart God or enjoys it when you fight with your loved ones. The devil has dominion over the earth to tempt you, drag you through the bramble and valleys.

The devil is delighting in your misery and your letting it do just that.

God is not a magician. There is no wand to be waved. If there is maybe your praying to the wrong God. Prayers aren't always answered or answered right away for reasons we can not begin to fathom!

Have a falling out with church? Or perhaps people are judgmental/cliquish at church. Maybe your going to the wrong church. I'm going because I want to hear God's word not because I want to join groups or see what this person is wearing or the latest gossip about such and such. I'm going to join hopefully like minded persons. A church should be a place of healing. A place to find comfort. No one there is without sin. Consider it a hospital for broken spirits. And don't harden your heart if that place where you seek refuge is not what it should be.

I had no intentions on writing these things but have thought about my path and how the things of my past have come to be blessings.

Want to learn more check these out:
Common Man's Institute
Reg Kelly
Dr. David Peacock

Still reading? Great! Now look at my life. God has moved mountains and made miracles in my life. Please read my story of Lyme disease as well as a Survivor of Domestic Violence for my story. Also check  here for my vlogs.

I know I am still pondering the wonders of how everything turned out the way it did....

Thanks for listening to me ramble!

Wherever your journey takes you, know I bid you happiness and joy.

BIG HUGS!
Mel

Wednesday, May 31, 2017

Great Scott! There are a ton of weeds!

My poor garden! It looks like a jungle! With all the rain we had a few weeks back it is now pretty overgrown and we are just starting the season. My mulch pile has dwindled and I may call around to local tree trimming groups again to see if someone takes pity on me.

I'm happy to report I planted about 45ish Sunflowers, Jalapeno's, Green Pepper plants, more Garlic, Zucchini, Chamomile, and Marjoram.

Found my herbs in the weeds doing well except- Basil, Dill and Stevia. Dang Rabbit has been nibbling on that and at least 15 of the Sunflowers I just planted yesterday! WAH! It ate my poppies seedlings too!

We have tried a bit of natural deterrents but haven't had a lot of luck. I'll keep scouring the web. I did find some more not so organic determent's but really want keep our garden as spray free as possible.

Farm fail include that rabbit eating our plants, a new chick died, a bunch of baby bunnies we yanked out of the yard were eaten by a Raccoon which was caught and is not with us anymore. On the plus side we did gain a new Rooster! Despite my no naming the animals policy this guy seemed like a Fred.  Cocky Locky my Banty is not doing so good. Much to my dismay I'm quite sure he is on the verge of passing away. He really isn't eating and rarely comes out of "The Abbey". We do have a broody hen and she has taken to stuff duck eggs to sit on. I'm pretty stoked about it and we will see what happens!

My Mom blessed us with several bunches of perennials that will perk up next year. I was also given a bunch from Mom's neighbor that I have yet to plant.

Speaking of which we went over to help Mom and Dad open their pool and did some minor things around their house. We hope to get over there a lot more often to help. Dad is doing much better and is happy to drive again. He's getting a bit agitated that he isn't getting around like he used to. He does need to get some dental work and a knee replacement and hopes for find out when he can get the okay to do so.







A few weeks back we also took time to see some wonderful kite flying at Fair Oaks Farm called Fair in the Air. They were a wonderful sight to see and are HUGE! Some of them are 20 Ft+! Wish I had a better camera or phone these pictures do not give the event any justice. We just stayed to watch for a bit and had a good time.

Mr. Awesome has been keeping himself busy with minor roof repairs, building projects, organizing, learning how to fix Carburetors, and aspiring to make cool stuff with Blacksmith.

I have been doing what I feel is the bare minimum and not for the lack of trying. I'm just so stinking tired. I did make a Plantain/Comfrey Salve, drying Lavender, Cilantro, Peppermint, Sage (Making Smudge sticks), editing my book (Slowly, it's been a challenge to revisit the memories), sleeping a lot, planting, weeding, studying my edible weeds in our yard, trying to figure out what is medicinal and added a Super to the beehive. I didn't participate in the last Flea market because I felt the weather was too breezy and I wasn't feeling so good (Lyme).





Excited Peanut has her first job starting soon! I'm hoping this will help with her social anxieties and plan to discuss some supplements with the Amazing Jen that may help.


I picked up these pinwheels and a few pink flamingos that just tickled me! I know I'm a dork but I sometimes have things speak to me. Oh, not literally, it's one of those things that randomly calls out to you and just wants to go home with you. Not that you need them mind you. They make me smile!

 Here is the bee Super and hiding in the background is Is  won't be surprised if they don't become targets for my adventurous Dad and Son team of hunters. SIGH! It was much to Mr. Awesome's chagrin that I bid and won them.


I haven't been online a lot. Kind of taking a hiatus. This does mean I miss a bunch of events, family and friend updates. It's not that it is just social media but stepping away from the computer has been nice. I was feeling tied and riveted to reading statues, seeing bad news or celeb stuff. I'm being honest when I tell you I don't know many of the celebs now that includes musicians as well. I know I must be living under a rock. (And yes when 4/20 came around I didn't get the reference) I don't think I'm alone by doing this. I don't miss it either, though Pinterest and Instagram are still my favorites and if we do watch anything it's been on YouTube and Netflix (Anne with an E was wonderful!).

The upcoming week will be filled with more planting! Wish me luck! I hope your week is joyful and blessed.




Wednesday, May 10, 2017

Another chicken bites the dust and Bee update!

With heavy heart we had a chicken kick the bucket. No, not this bucket! Quite literally she is not playing in this picture! Mr. Awesome and I came out to gather eggs last week. She was just laying in the Abbey, still warm. The only thing I could think of is perhaps she was egg bound. I hadn't noticed her acting any different prior to this the days before.

There are many wee projects being done in and around the house which include fixing a leak on part of the roof on the back of the house. Electrically fixes as well as Mr. Awesome shaking his head alot as he explained to me the complexity of how confusing the repairs of wiring from the previous owner are. We will never know why things were done as they were.

What do I mean? Wires leading to nowhere. Boxes/Wires leading to spots that are supposed to be off but are still hot as well as boarded over as if they were finished?

It's a big puzzle! Much to the dismay of my partner.😨

The garden is still a work in progress. I am fighting a losing battle with the weeds again. I had hoped to have the garden mulched in but am unable to find a source that will happily deliver mulch without charging.  I did get a great tip on some but don't live close enough to get it.

We did put in 2 Pear trees! We hope to also purchase a few Peach trees in the near future as well.

The Cherry trees are full! I can't wait for harvest!

I scored some old windows for the future greenhouse. I was so excited to find them. And yes I found them in the garbage. I happily picked through a pile while my Husband advised he didn't know me and shrunk down in his seat. Sadly, there are 2 things that are problems with picking through trash... It's illegal in many locations and you may get caught! Luckily, the police officer let me off with a warning this time. Oh, I air walk on the wild side at times. I supposed if I'm going to get in trouble, why not doing something I love?




I made Dandelion Jelly, Wild Violet Jelly, Dandelion and Wild Violet Salves! I also starting drying leaves and flowers for later this year and for sale. I hadn't canned in a few years. I didn't have the strength quite literally from getting sick (Lyme Disease) this is the first time since 2014 I canned! I missed it!


The Amberlink chicks are outside now. Mr. Awesome moved them into Alcatraz today. They are of course nervous and exploring the new digs. We will move them again with the rest of the crew in about a month. With the weather getting warmer they were due.

On the 21st will be the next Fleamarket and I'll be hauling a Jewelry box that doubles as a small dresser or lingerie dresser. Also a top of a hutch, some garden things, possibly some concrete garden leaves (this one I haven't started on so they may not be ready in time) and more plants! I did really well selling my Spider plants and Peppermint that I will be bringing more. So if you have nothing to do stop by and say HI! I'll have my St. Paddy's Day flag out on top of the Jeep to mark my spot.

I will also have my Lyme Disease Awareness information available! If you have questions about Lyme I'll be happy to answer them to the best of my knowledge or perhaps you are interested in a local group? Let me know!

We did a quick bee check yesterday to view progress. We have had the bees for 3 weeks now. They are busy today! The weather is warmer then it has been. We noticed they are carrying pollen. YEA! I added the frame I took out during our initial install. I refilled their sugar water which is refilled every other day or so.

Most importantly! The kids have come by with the baby. It's
always such a joy to see Shortstack. She is getting so BIG! 9 months already! I have to pester my Step-Daughter to ask about her big boy! I wish we lived closer to visit. I mentioned to Mr. Awesome that perhaps he could visit once our super late getting back to us tax refund comes back. As much as he wants to, he doesn't feel right leaving the kids and me here while he has fun. We have the animals so just going would be hard. I also have no plans on ever flying due to my fear of it.

Our school bus project is shelved and it may just become a mobile fixture in our side yard for company. The Gypsy trailer is still in the planning stages. Many of our plans due rely on funds that we just don't have readily available. We have been blessed with donations of unwanted material and stuff from family and friends.

If you have been following my other blog Hope when there was none- A story of escaping abuse you'll be interested to know that my eldest Son has been in contact with me (see story there) and we printed off a copy of my book to edit! It's been intense as I muddle through the editing process. 😞I hope to get it published before the end of the year. I haven't decided if it is going to be in parts or just one big ebook yet.


All in all it's been a challenging busy few weeks with more to come!  Thanks for stopping by! Don't forget to view our other social media pages!

Wherever your journey is taking you may it be as wonderful as you are ❤

BIG HUGS!
Mel